You write such pretty words

Sat, 22 Apr 2006 06:17:19 GMT

Alright. I sold it.

My television set.

I don't miss the midnight Jessica Simpson commercials where Proactive helps people fight acne. I miss ~~the movies on Scifi with the horrible effects~~ movies in general. I CAN'T EVEN WATCH DVDS, JESUS H. CHRIST. I'm bringing a few of those over to my...former job. It'll do me good to face that guy again.

But I'm over it. Naruto, I didn't say it, 'cause I usually don't, but...thanks for coming around. I needed someone to shove me back into place.

And, I've got a new job. It's fucken horrible, at least compared to Sound, but...I develop photos. Shit, I feel like a teenager'r somethin'. But money's money. I'll deal.

I'm gonna start composin' again. I haven't written in about a year. Hell, I haven't PLAYED anything in months. But I need some direction. I can't deal with not know what I'm going to do with myself anymore.

Well, finally....

Tue, 07 Mar 2006 23:38:21 GMT

Alright, I dunno how much longer I can hide out in this apartment and smoke like a chimney, but I bet it'll be a long-ass time. I don't even hafta go to work anymore. Yukari (my PO) came by a couple days ago, makin' sure I was all good and proper. The most she could scold me for was my messy place. I better get a new job soon so she doesn't have another reason to pay me a visit.

[privvy]
He didn't say anything when I said I was quitting. He didn't ask any questions. He didn't even try an' stop me. I ~~wanted~~ fully expected him to put up a fight, to try an' convince me. Something. Nothing. Maybe he was thinkin' of cuttin' this off himself. After all, he does have a family and a life. There's no reason for him to waste his time with a useless, aimless girl like me.

I should be out looking for some place else, maybe take up the offer of the bakery, but...I can't. I feel so stupid for expecting him to...I didn't love him or anything ridiculious like that, but at least there was a tie in there somewhere, even if it was just an employer/employee, fucker/fuckee thing going on there.

My food's old and I need to buy some more, but I can't step outside. Not right now. I'm runnin' outta cigarettes, too. Fuck.
[/privvy]

Sat, 18 Feb 2006 18:46:20 GMT

Man, it's COLD AS FUCK here. I went to bed in my clothes and my mouth tastes like crap. Too lazy to change or brush my teeth, so what I am complaining for? Met up with a few friends last night. I almost forgot what it was like to actually...I don't know.

Ragging on me for not doing something. Like WHAT? I think I'm gonna get a hobby. Maybe Hinata, you can teach me to ~~burn shit~~ bake. Or...I can plant trees. Maybe I'll join a booOr learn how to sew! Shit, all these ideas suck. I can't see myself doing any of this. Maybe I'm just not cut out for hobbies.

I'm gonna go get myself a smoke and listen to The Buzzcocks

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 23:20:30 GMT

I've been listenin' to this stupid song on repeat for hours. It's dreary, ~~and wonderful~~ and it's pissing me off. Fuckin' Bright Eyes.

Yeah, I haven't been around lately. Not that I'm gonna start spoutin' stupid excuses or 'nething...I just haven't. I went into a a small bout of anti-socialness and wasn't up for seeing anyone. I even went up front a lot at work, just so the boss wouldn't be able to ask for a quick favor.

I actually am gettin' sick of him. I need better sex. I like my job, though, so...I don't wanna make any sudden changes...

I need ice cream and some good salad and eggrolls.

Memories

Tue, 20 Dec 2005 04:27:58 GMT

With everyone wandering back to where they began, one can't help but remember the good ole days. Well, the relatively good ole days...Okay, nevermind.

Okay. I need to get out more. I mean, damn. All these people have done something with themselves and where am I? Screwing my boss for a job I barely enjoy and getting wasted all the goddam time. But what can I do with a fuckin' Music major? I'm not teachin' kids shit.

I'll wait until that hit an' run shit's cleared up and probation's finished (not that I have a choice in the matter, anyway) and then maybe I'll take a good long break from this place.

I'm gonna go listen to Nellie McKay, eat the cookies lovely Hinata gave me (how'd the inspection go?) and maybe try to believe in the fat man dressed in red.

~~I need a smoke. And a drink. And a good punching bag.~~

Sun, 18 Dec 2005 04:46:30 GMT

Some lady and her kid came by the store. They left a bag full of books, so I snagged it and was flipping through them for a while (lucky me). There was this one called Stone Fox or something, and it was a real tear jerker (a for a book that's only 81 pages, anyway).

The crowd cheered madly when they saw little Willy come into view at the far end of Main Street, and even more madly when they saw that Stone Fox was right on his tail.

"Go, Searchlight! Go!"

Searchlight forged ahead. But Stone Fox was gaining!

"Go, Searchlight! Go!" little Willy cried out.

Searchlight gave it everything she had.

She was a hundred feet from the finish line when her heart burst. She died instantly. There was no suffering.

Manager wants to see me again tomorrow night. Probably because we have next weekend off with Christmas and all...~~Family time for him, wallowing in music for me.~~

I think I'll go shopping for presents tomorrow, too. Instead of asking what people want, I'll do this: Who wants something and what is it? If it's over twenty bucks, screw you.

Fri, 16 Dec 2005 01:38:38 GMT

test TEST. Working.

*primp*